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Wednesday, September 21, 2016

Constantly Evolving

I stumbled upon my blog again today, and started reading some of my previous posts.
Couldn't go through all of them at once, 243 posts aren't easy to go through in one session.

It fascinated me how much I evolved and changed since the date of some posts. Some of them are so negative and gloomy, I know that I usually reach out to my blog when I'm sad, angry, frustrated or just need to let out something, rarely when I'm positive, but I still think I evolved and changed a lot since then.

Now I have an opposite positive outlook to life, I love life, I love people, I have lots of hope and my Utopian used-to-be-dream now seem achievable.

Few observations and most of the posts are 6-7 years old:
- I was negative in life, now I'm living it positively and happily, appreciating every moment of it.
- Pain (physical and emotional) plays a huge role in shaping my identity, my thoughtsbeliefs and ideology.
- I'm extremely sensitive to pain.
- My capacity to love, my passion, my giving, ability to forgive, all fearlessly, is overwhelming

Like Nothing

He left like i'm nothing, like i don't exist, or in best cases, like i'm just an object, a neglected piece of furniture...
I don't exist.
He just promised a couple of days ago he won't do this.